Down here on the floor where i'm not supposed to love you anymore

Somehow he managed to keep it locked up inside. From watching the other leave, to seeing the plane take off - all of it was locked up deep inside and held tight under lock and key that nothing could crack it open. Their time together felt so short - it didn't even amount to one whole year. Lake had returned home for the summer break and only managed to keep in contact with his boyfriend from school via phone and email. A few times Dimitri had visited, or vice versa, but nothing longer than a weekend or three to four days were spent together during the whole time summer lasted. Back at school things felt like they'd never change. True Dimitri was no longer a student and therefore allowed on Campus - but that didn't stop him.

But things had ended.

Dimitri had to go back to Russia.

Lake had done his best to keep the parting as far from sad as possible. There were to be no tears shed between them, just warm smiles. But the 'See you soon' given felt as heartbreaking as 'Goodbye'.

Back in his dorm room - alone - Lake finally gave up the hold. Back against the closed door he sunk down to the floor, burying his head in his arms as the tears fell from his eyes. Feet flat on the floor, legs were pulled up so that he could hide behind his knees, curling up on the floor.


..............

He was running late. His previous appointment had run on longer than he wanted and now he was late getting to the show. If he was too late he'd miss out on getting the best spot and loose all the best shots. Racing through the main lobby, clutching his camera to his chest Lake's attention was elsewhere that he didn't notice the young woman on her phone that he was on a collision course with.

Neither could have predicted what happened next, but many of the on-lookers could see it happening in almost slow motion. The young honey brown haired male ran straight into the brunette woman, causing them both to come crashing to the floor.

Pushing himself up to take stock of the situation, brown eyes looked down at the woman beneath him.

"Well, this is a first," she said, arching a delicately shaped brow.

"I'll say - I'm not used to being on top of girls," Lake replied while trying immensely hard not to blush.

"Well, roll over and I'll top you then, honey."

"You mean like sex!? Eww, no!"

The woman started laughing, throwing her head back and accidentally smacking the back of his skull against the tiled lobby floor. Scrunching her eyes closed, she reached up to the injured part of her head.

Crawling off of her, Lake offered his hand to the woman he had just collided with. "I'm really sorry about that. I'm usually not this much of a klutz."

Once up on her feet, she dusted herself off. Lake helped her locate her phone and she with his camera. Once they were all set, she gave Lake a smile. "You here for the show?"

"I've probably lost the place with the best angles." He gave a sigh of defeat and hung his head.

She smiled and patted him on the shoulder. "I've got a backstage pass. Want to join me?"

His eyes widened at her, jaw almost falling open in shock and surprise. "Honestly?"

"Honestly." She smiled again. "I'm Noelle. Come on, I'll buy you coffee afterwards. You know, as thanks for topping me."

Lake acquired some of his best photographs he had in a long time. He discovered that Noelle was also a photographer. While they sat in a nearby coffee shop chatting away, Lake buying her a bagel as a way to apologize for crashing into her, Noelle brought up a subject Lake had locked away inside. One he tried not thinking about since high school.

"So you single, Lake?"

"Since high school. He had to leave just before I turned eighteen," he said, staring down into his coffee. "Had a few dates over the years, but nothing really serious."

"How old are you now?"

"Nineteen."

She gave him a bright smile, reaching over the table to give a friendly and reassuring squeeze to the male's shoulder. "Don't worry, I'm sure he misses you too."

Lifting his head, Lake swallowed on his tears. "Sometimes I just lie on the floor and pretend that I never loved him. But then I get up, and remember his smile. Do you think that's weird?"

"No honey, not at all."

Getting back home after meeting Noelle, and revealing so much to what was essentially a stranger, Lake closed the door behind himself. Pressing his back to the wood, he slid down to the floor, head tilted back to look up at the ceiling. One leg stretched out in front of him, the other bent at the knee with one arm loosely slung over it Lake let his tears fall once more.


...........

Noelle was hovering behind him as he sat typing away at his computer. Glancing over his shoulder at her, he could see her leaning forwards and reading his email while one hand stroked her stomach.

"Am I the only person you've ever topped?" she joked.

"Do you have to read my personal stuff?"

"Lake, honey, I read your diary." Noelle grinned impishly at him, then reached over to ruffle his hair. "Put the address on the bottom, and your new phone number."

Brows furrowed as he leaned back in the seat to look at her while she pottered around his room. "Why?"

"Because maybe next time he's in New York he can come and pick you up off the floor."